Justin Bieber May Get Exposure Where the Sun Don’t Shine
By Jeremy D. Larson
Not unlike sitting in the hospital waiting room waiting for your first child to be born or anxiously watching the news for the results of a Presidential election, the world now waits with bated breath to see the private parts of singer, alleged felon and all-around Canadian rascal, Justin Bieber.
Justin Bieber’s privates are now a matter of public record, which let’s be frank is more than most men can say of their own banana, and a photo of Bieber’s frank ‘n beans will soon be released into the wild of the internet.
Judge William Altfield of the Miami-Dade County Court has decreed that, collaterally speaking, Bieber’s crotch area can and will be used evidence in his recent Miami arrest. The judge plans to release five videos from the arrest night, including, but not limited to, a video of Bieber’s exposed lower half as he is taking a urine test. As Miami Herald reports, authorities will “shade or blacken” Bieber’s mancave.