She Mail – To Bring A Gift Or Not To Bring A Gift
Here is this morning’s question:
We were invited to our friend’s 40th birthday party recently. It was a surprise party thrown by the husband at a fancy restaurant and they reserved the entire back room. Fancy invitations were sent out and in plain bold print they said: “no gifts please – just bring your warm and pleasant company”. So we didn’t bring any gifts. When we got to the party, pretty much EVERYONE else had a gift for the birthday girl. Even worse, she seemed delighted.
Look, we aren’t cheap and would definitely have brought something for her. In addition to feeling embarrassed, my friend acted different towards me and hasn’t returned my calls, which isn’t like her.
Do people not mean it what they say when they say “no gifts please” and how are we supposed to know that? Should we do something now?”
Empty Handed & Embarrassed
This is a tough call! We think the husband blew it from the onset by telling everyone to NOT bring gifts! Why would anyone do that for a surprise party?
I always bring a gift, even when the invitation says “No Gift.” Yes, I’m the one. SORRY! If no one else brought a gift, I’ll try to sneak it to my friend. I personally LIKE buying gifts for my friends, so it’s a treat for me as well as a treat for them.
If you are throwing a party and you genuinely DON’T want gifts, I suggest giving your friends an option. Instead of saying “No Gifts,” tell them to donate to your favorite charity or bring canned goods for a food bank. Then people won’t feel weird about showing up empty handed.
And for the record, Tony & I ALWAYS welcome gifts!
Remember, if you ever need help or just want us to hash out your problem on the air, contact us at: email@example.com.