Top Ten Love Songs That NEVER Work

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This is what happens when you put "Muskrat Love" on a Valentines Day mixtape (Photo by Joe Robbins/Getty Images)

This is what happens when you put “Muskrat Love” on a Valentines Day mixtape (Photo by Joe Robbins/Getty Images)

Our previous list of the Top 10 Love Songs That Always Work may not always work for you (but I promise they won’t do any major damage). These ten songs, on the other hand, are like inviting your boss to your house for an intimate Valentine’s Day Dinner for three: they’re not known for their aphrodisiac qualities.

#10. Air Supply – “Making Love Out of Nothing at All”

Play this song on V-Day and you’ll be making a bed out of two kitchen chairs and a folded up parka.


#9. America – “Muskrat Love”

I’m an America fan and even I know better. “Muskrat Suzie, Muskrat Sam.” Thirty years hence and I still don’t get it.


#8. Andy Willliams – “The Theme From Romeo and Juliet (Where Do I Begin)”

OK to play if your Valentine is your Mom.


#7. Anne Murray – “I Just Fall in Love Again”

However, it will not be with you.


#6. Bonnie Tyler – “Total Eclipse of the Heart”

As you can see, this song does not include “love” in the title. Don’t let that give you a false sense of security: it will dampen the mood like a snowball in your drawers.


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